My nipples are turning brown and my freckles are connecting into one large brown spot. By the end of next week I will be as full of ultraviolet rays as a raisin in the sun.

This morning I made her a pirate’s breakfast… a strawberry, banana and orange juice smoothie swimming in a golden bath (not shower) of spiced rum. Even though I live where most people go on vacation, I rarely remember to take advantage of it myself.

Now that you know that… I will go back to vacationing. I will update again when my nipples are the color of a nice cup o’ black coffee.

Until then…

I think most people can understand the looting—when it is for a purpose. If your family is hungry and there is nothing else you can do in the circumstance, then take whatever food you can find in your foraging. If your baby needs diapers, then, again, take what you can find. However, I think the line stops there.

If you are caught pushing a shopping cart through the flooded streets of New Orleans, not only should you be ashamed of yourself, you should have your head held to the pavement under all that water until you are on the edge of death. You are almost the worst kind of opportunist there is.

Almost.

I save that title for whichever group of young men is going around the city raping women. You are the worst kind of opportunist there is. To take a situation like this and use it in such a manner is unconscionable.

And snipers firing at helicopters attempting to evacuate people… Why? What reason could there possibly be for that? I have looked deep in the recesses of my brain to try and find a rational answer for that but there is not one to be found. It simply defies all logic.

I thought the true looters should be held under the flood waters until they were on the edge of death. I think you last two types should be the sole remaining people in city and they should reverse the pumps. That’s right. Pull all of the water from the lake and the river into the streets you are roving until each and every one of you are gone. And if there were a way to identify you from the bodies of the real victims, then you’d be the last things that were cleaned up.